It's been over six months since I became a Mommy and I already feel like I've learned so much. I've truly grown as a person. Because of the twins I hold my behavior to the highest standard and continually strive to be the very best version of myself. I have more patience than I never had before. I find joy in the simplest of things. I can function pretty darn well on very little sleep. It's like I've been reprogrammed as a stronger, more efficient human being. And surprisingly, while my days are probably more taxing than ever before, I am less stressed.
I've learned new ways to have fun. Something as simple as hearing the twins giggle can make my whole day. Going out dancing has been replaced with bopping around the house entertaining the babies with their favorite, "The Mommy Show." I spend most of the day on the floor playing with them and doing their exercises to help them develop and grow strong. My idea of a relaxing read takes place in the middle of the night after they've been fed and are sitting upright for a bit due to reflux, and it's usually articles about parenting and child development.
I've learned that you can't really nap when they nap. In those few precious moments they sleep during the day, that's when I scramble to sterilize and prep bottles, clean the house, and tackle the never-ending piles of laundry.
I've learned that I will no longer come first when it comes to anything. Showering is a luxury that usually has to wait until hubby gets home and dinner has been made. I've gone days without brushing my hair, but it's okay as long as the twins are clean, fed and happy. Their happiness & health = mine.
I've learned to not be so easily grossed out. I used to look at babies and shiver to think about changing diapers and wiping drool. Now it's not a day if I don't get thrown up on, poop on my hands, or drool on my face (not my own!). Hell, over the past few days alone I've been puked on. Twice. Like Projectile vomit down my bra. Drooled on to the point of being soaked. Had diarrhea shoot out at me and all over the changing table and blankets. And my neck peed on. I'm officially a burp cloth/diaper hybrid. I frequently smell butts and get excited when the babies have a normal poop. I pick noses, suck out snot, clean pacifiers with my mouth, and occasionally have to use my hand to wipe spit up. Not only am I not grossed out, I love every minute of it!
I've learned to multitask like never before. For me that word used to mean walking and texting at the same time or having a dozen tabs open on my computer. Now multitasking is more like prepping dinner and sterilizing bottles while holding a baby. Or feeding two suddenly super cranky, hungry babies at once. Or doing lunges and squats while folding laundry. Or, in this case, writing a blog post with one hand on my phone while feeding a baby in the middle of the night!
I've learned to be more organized. When you're suddenly responsible for twice the amount of people there's a whole lot more stuff to keep track of. When I bring the babies over to someone's house it looks like we're moving in! I've also learned not to be so hard on myself when things get a bit disorganized at times or when I don't get as much done as I would have liked. Whereas I used to make a list of chores to get done for the DAY I've come to realize it's more likely going to take a WEEK to get through.
I've learned to be a better wife. Since the babies arrived, my hubby has stepped up to the plate more than I ever could have ever dreamed possible. He has been completely hands on with the twins since we had them and takes pride in being a good father. He devotes his free time to playing with them even when he's had a long day at work and feeds them during the night on weekends so I can get some sleep. He's truly been wonderful. I know not all men are like that so I am incredibly grateful to have such an amazing husband & father to the twins. And because of this I am so appreciative for all he does that I try to let it show in everything I do. From cooking, to cleaning and being the best wife and mommy I possibly can. Which, in turn, has made him appreciate me even more. We no longer sweat the small stuff and look at everything in more of a "bigger picture" kind of way. Becoming a Mommy has change me for the better, making me a softer, more patient and nurturing wife. The days can seem long when it's just me and the twins and we only get a small window of time with Daddy. I cherish those few short hours like a precious gem.
Having the twins has changed my life, and myself as a person. Like a caterpillar to a butterfly, when they were born it's like I shed my former self and emerged someone completely different. Ready to spread my wings and fly into my new role and wrap them around my family to protect them. It was as if all past wrongs were suddenly made right and I was at once made whole. Complete. At peace. Each day since has been one learning experience after another, filled with more love, joy and poopy diapers than I could have ever imagined. And for that, I am truly grateful.